What truly is “Anti-adoption” and would you consider yourself?

Question by …: What truly is “Anti-adoption” and would you consider yourself?
to be “Anti-adoption”.

Please leave your opinions of other people out of this, what do YOU consider yourself to be even if not “Anti-adoption”?
may I ask, under what circumstance do you feel adoptions are okay?

Best answer:

Answer by DevonChaos
I try not to put a label to my beliefs because then people will assume I believe in certain ideas based on that label.

Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!

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16 thoughts on “What truly is “Anti-adoption” and would you consider yourself?”

  1. Would “Anti-adoption” be that no-one can adopt? If so I think it’s stupid!

    I personally think and believe that anyone that cannot have children or just plain want to can adopt! There are so many kids out there without parents and vise versa. They should be able to adopt if they have the means to care for a child and give them what a chile needs! It’s doesn’t matter is you’re homosexual or mexican or whatever!

  2. Lets see. Most consider me anti-adoption but I am not. I am pro adoption reform. Will that ever happen? No not in my lifetime.

    I am probably one that leans more to the anti adoption side because I see what the industry makes on adoption. We are not just talking about domestic infant. We are also talking about international adoption and foster care/foster care adoption.

    I am also seeing more and more adoptive parents siding with the anti-adoption crew. Why? They too are getting burned for doing what we ask them to do.

  3. It’s not clear cut to answer. There are some that believe that any adoption should be overturned and the children returned to their families of origin. There are some who believe that the policies of adoption are fundamentally flawed because of the legalized lies and smothering of original identity. There are some who believe that guardianship and kinship care should be the main focus. There are some that believe that human trafficking for international adoption is tragic and systematic plucking of a culture out from under them. There are those opposed to foster care adoption because of how broken the system is for attempting to do what is needed for the children and families forced to use that system. There are those that believe that the adoption industry needs serious reform and regulation or banishment.

    All of it falls under the idea of anti-adoption when it comes to the unicorn fart adoption is wonderful crowd. The trouble is when people who believe in reform is necessary get worried that they are being negatively lumped in with the others who seems more crazy then they are. The “oh I fall here on the spectrum, but I’m not nearly as extreme as those over there…”

    I am anti-adoption in most circumstances. I would rather see the humanity come back in the process of reaching out to those that have to consider surrender, abandonment and relinquishment of their children. I would rather see the children that really need homes attended to, instead of exploiting women and societies into awful social policies and treated like bovine breeders and puppy mills.

  4. I definitely would not consider myself “anti-adoption”. I think there are a few things wrong with the whole “adoption” process, one of those being the cost of adoption which seem to be a little insane. Adoption Agencies want these kids to go to good homes that can care for them, then why in the world are we charging adoptive parents $ 20,000 + to adopt?

    I’ve experinced adoption twice with two “cousins” (not blood related). From what I saw, both babies who were placed from birth went to very good couples and are in a much better place then if they would have stayed with the birth mothers. Of course, all situations are different. But I would never put down a woman for trying to do what she feels is best for her child.

  5. I’m anti-unethical/unnecessary/and closed adoptions.

    I’m pro-foster care adoption that remains open (unless there are issues of abuse or drugs/alcohol).

    I believe in providing homes for children who need them, not babies for people who want them.

  6. I can not be anti adoption. My daughter got great parents. I am for more informed decisions. If a woman wants to put her child up for adoption I want her to examine her reasons and have all sides of the affects. Not just the side that makes another couple or a single parent happy.

  7. Young parents and/or financial problems – completely and passionately anti-adoption. Any adoptive parent who takes advantage of these situations justly earns the vulture label.

    Abuse and neglect – Anyone who harms a child (adoptive, natural, foster, guardian) does mandatory jail time. If adoption is required to protect the child, completely and passionately pro-adoption.

  8. I am not against adoption-if a woman is not going to parent for whatever reason,I would want that child to be adopted and given a good life.

    **it is so funny how you get thumbs down for saying you believe in adoption..you people make me ill**

  9. i, like you, don’t like labels. But if i had to apply one to myself, i’d say “Adoptee who learns something new everyday.”

  10. To say someone is anti or pro adoption is a bit too restrictive. While I’m generally in favour of adoptions:

    – I don’t believe that all domestic adoptions as immoral.
    – I don’t believe that all domestic adoptions are flawless.
    – I don’t believe that all international adoptions are human trafficking.
    – I don’t believe that all international adoptions are perfect.
    – I don’t feel that all women who place a child for adoption are coerced.
    – I don’t feel that all women who place a child for adoption are perfect.
    – I don’t believe that adoption agencies are only in it for the money.
    – I don’t believe that they only cater to people who want to buy a baby.
    – I don’t believe that those who want to adopt a baby are selfish or evil or in search of a child they can mould.
    – I don’t believe that adoptive parents should hide the adoption from their child.
    – I understand the frustration over amended birth certificates but I also understand the legalities behind them.
    – I understand an adoptees desire to know where they came from but I also accept the fact that there are those who placed a child for adoption don’t want their info disclosed.
    – I don’t believe that those who are infertile are taking the “second best” route to having a family.
    – I don’t believe that everyone who wants to adopt should be allowed or able to.
    – I don’t believe that every celebrity who adopts is “buying a baby”, “breaking the law”, doing so for the recognition or for selfish reasons.

    And, I understand that the world is not perfect but it’s the best we have and:
    – the need for adoption is not going to go away overnight;
    – there will always be a need for adoption;
    – regardless of how you feel about it there are literally millions of needy children in search of loving homes.

  11. I consider myself pro-adoption for children who truly need homes and families to parent them, but pro-reform. I am against coerced adoption, sealed records, lies, and unnecessary family separations.

    Personally, I would view anti-adoption as people who believed that adoption was always wrong, for all children/families in all circumstances. If someone took a more moderate view than the absolute extreme, I would consider them pro-reform and/or pro- family preservation.

    I would phrase it as a positive (“pro” what they do support) rather than negative unless their viewpoint was completely without shades of grey in saying adoption was all unquestioned badness.

  12. This is probably going to put me in a box that I will never be able to get out of, but yes, I am anti-adoption, as it is practiced today in the United States. I know that there will always be 1-2% of women who never want to have children and are not going to abort. I know that there will be orphans, and children who truly cannot live with their natural families. These children exist.

    However, in our country, women and children are the lowest rungs on the power ladder, particularly pregnant women. Having BEEN predated upon, I know how it sucks. Adoption is big business, largely unregulated in the United States. We protect business, we protect profits. It is women and children that we don’t protect. Babies are a commodity and that is shameful. Our women and babies deserve respect, honor and protection from the people who profit from them.

    That is why I, when give such limited choices, choose the label of anti-adoption, which I am actually not, totally. Nor am I thrilled with labels that limit me or other women. We put each other in boxes, and dismiss and that is the end of conversation.

  13. I agree with Randy when he said, “to say someone is anti or pro adoption is a bit too restrictive.”

    BUT- unlike Randy,

    If “anti-adoption” means to make ALL adoptions ethical and rare, then I will raise my hand.

    -I believe that all domestic newborn adoptions are immoral, unless there is abuse, which is rare in newborn adoptions

    -I believe pre-birth matching should be illegal.

    -I believe NO money should be made from adoption. By anyone.

    – I believe that all international adoptions are human trafficking. Whether the adoption is because of poverty, or forced by inhumane governments, you are STILL buying a child, and mostly because you cannot get newer ones in North America.

    – I feel that MOST women who place a child for adoption are coerced.

    – I don’t feel that all women who place a child for adoption are perfect.

    – I believe that adoption agencies are only in it for the money. Google it. Adoption is a BILLION dollar a year industry.

    – I believe that they only cater to people who want to buy a baby.

    – I believe that many who want to adopt a baby are selfish and are in search of a child they can mould.

    – I don’t believe that adoptive parents should hide the adoption from their child.

    – I understand an adoptees desire to know where they came from but I also accept the fact that there are those who placed a child for adoption don’t want their info disclosed…and well, too bad. Adoptees have the right to know their families.

    – I believe that those who are infertile are taking the “second best” route to having a family.

    – I don’t believe that everyone who wants to adopt should be allowed or able to.

    – I believe that every celebrity who adopts is “buying a baby”, “breaking the law”, and is doing so for the recognition or for selfish reasons….unless they adopt an older “domestic” child from foster care.

    I feel the ONLY acceptable adoptions are those through foster care, or when there is abuse and there is no one in the child’s natural family to raise the him or her. For me, ALL international and domestic newborn adoptions are not in the best interest of the child. (except when there is abuse…which again, is very rare in newborn adoptions)

  14. I believe in adoption. I feel adoptions are ok under most scenarios.
    I read in the paper today where a 9 wk old little boy has crushed ribs due to his father. If he survives he will go to a foster home if no responsible relatives are located,list of relatives comes from the parents.
    I just hope he lives to be adopted.
    I believe the majority of adopted children DO come from abusive homes and my stats support that belief. And that is tragic!

  15. What truly is ‘Anti-Adoption’?

    The label that is given to any person who does not give Praise on Bended Knee and Adulation to the Institution of Adoption.

    The label that is given to any person who questions the practices of the Institution of Adoption, it’s co-horts and minions.

    I am Semi-Anti-Adoption.

  16. I believe that growing up adopted is emotionally unhealthy–therefore, adoption should be avoided except in cases of abuse, addiction, or profound neglect.

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